Hi friends! I wish I were writing under happier circumstances. Unless things change, this may be the end for me. I've been turning down all shops offered to me lately in the past six or seven weeks because they only pay $5.00. The ones that pay more are taken before I can get to them since I spend a lot of time taking care of my parents. The higher paying shops are fewer and fewer. I'm still looking for full-time work; then I will pay someone to help me with my parents. I have a retail job today that pays $15.00, (I was called and asked to take it), but looking at the details, it will take me about 4 to 5 hours to complete including driving across town, the actual shop (4 departments), downloading and paperwork. There is no way that I will cancel on them because I said I will take it.

At this point, if nothing changes, I will do my last shop today.

C'est la vie

Mystery shopping doesn't work for everyone, sometimes because they don't like it or aren't suited t the work ....... and sometimes simply because there is too much competition in an area for them to make money with it.

Best of luck with whatever you choose to work at next.

Awww, sorry to hear that. It sounds like your life is not accommodating the shopper business as of now. The good thing about shopping is that it is always there. You could find that in a year from now it is again an option for you.

Good luck to you!!

So sorry to hear it's not working out for you. Are you registered with a lot of companies? (100-150)? It's really the only way to get the good paying jobs.

Thanks, guys for the advice!!! Oh gosh, though. I probably won't even get paid for it. I just discovered that I need reading glasses. I thought the shop was to be finished by 8pm, but it actually said 6pm. My receipt is stamped 7:18 pm. I put a note on the survey that said I would re-do it today if asked (today is the last day for submission), but so far no one has contacted me. Boy, did I goof. I'll keep you posted!

Probably nearly 35 so far, jpgilham, but you're right. I need to keep plugging away at getting registered to more. It's just so S-L-O-W...

I wish the best for you. It's a hard position to be in.

Hello, Lady, sorry you are having problems with your shopping. If you sign up with more companies, that may help you. I understand you are discouraged, but no need to quit when you can take a break at any time and start back up when you feel better. If the $5 shops are breaking you down, quit taking them. You can set yourself a dollar minimum and stick to it unless you run across a cheapie you can pick up along the way at no extra expense.

It sounds like you don't have anywhere near enough companies. I hope this gets better for you. I back off shopping at least a couple of times a year, in July and August, then again in the worse part of the winter, whenever that happens to hit. I think if I didn't break for the weather I'd get too burnt out and cooked up to shop anyway. Like any job, this is tiring and it gets old if you push yourself day after day.

You guys are the best and you're right. I won't quit just yet. You know how it is when life gets frustrating. Mom rediscovered her old boyfriend and Mom and I moved back to our home town in January; Mom got married in February and moved across town. They both need help (88 and 89 years old) so I am over there nearly every day. My own house is not organized since the move, and I can't find a job. On top of that, the IRS is bugging me and his side of the family hates us.

Things will only get better.

One step at a time. The things you can do nothing about: That his side of the family hates you. (Possible actions - suggest that they alternate days with you to visit the parents.) That your mom and her new husband need help virtually daily. (Again, suggest to his people that they alternate days with you to visit and help.)

Things you can do something about: Getting your surroundings organized. Set yourself a schedule and prioritize. 10PM to 11PM is when I do most of my housekeeping except for vacuuming. It is when my 'better half' has gone to sleep already and I can put on some music that won't disturb him and just 'getter dun'. I'm too tired to do anything else productive by then, so a little physical activity, then a little 'cooling down' and I'm ready to sleep.

IRS will need to be dealt with and the sooner you can get a 'round tuit' the sooner it will be off your back.

Finding a job may seem like the highest priority, but in reality if the rest of your world is chaos you are unlikely to come off in an interview as calm, competent and collected.

Best wishes to you in getting it all together. Probably better to treat shopping as 'taking a break' these days rather than as employment.

Well, I don't want to even rely on someone who doesn't like my mom. They don't even appear to like their own father. (They don't want us around because they think he doesn't know they have been taking liberties with his finances behind his back. He already told us that last year.)

I have to get organized enough to start my own business. Since I've taken care of Mom for 8 and a half years, I have "no recent work history". That's their way of saying "you haven't been working, so you must not want to work". My mom was deathly ill and in the hospital every other month. The fact that she ran off and got married says to me that I did my job VERY WELL. I just didn't get paid for it! Somewhere between all that I also nursed my brother back to health after he developed cancer, then fell out of a tree and shattered bones on one side of his body.

I've got to file my and my mom's back taxes. Slowly but surely; but not fast enough for the IRS. IRS will just have to wait. They know that everytime I file I get a refund, and I don't own anything they can take. Every time I file a year, they apply the refund to another year. When I finally get it all filed, I'll have enough to live on for awhile. SICK OF THE IRS.

From my experience, the IRS is actually staffed by pretty nice and reasonable human beings. Since that seems to be a high priority worry for you, I would suggest calling them and clearly explaining your situation and getting that piece of the pie taken care of as soon as you can.

(heart)

How many years of back taxes are we talking about?

Since they owe you money it may seem counter productive at a glance, after all they can't sue you when you have already overpaid, but your best bet would be to focus on getting that all filed. When we owe them money they have years to come after us. I think refunds go away after five years. Even if they are applying refunds older than five years to your newer "bills" it doesn't mean they are going to give you any real money if you go past five.

Actually, refunds go away after three years, but since I have been dealing with this for so long (I got behind because of my own illness and the disorganization that comes with that) until they owe me refunds from 2002. Not all years since 2002 because I filed some of them too late, but until I get all of them filed they will release none of them. 2002 was filed on time but they lost it. Now I must file 2002 (I found my original and lost it again in my piles of papers and disorganization), 2010, 2011, 2012 (I filed 2013 on time), and a few weeks ago they added 2001. I don't even remember 2001.

The IRS started messing with us when my husband was in the military and we were moving nearly every year. One year they told us that we didn't deserve any earned income credit because we did not have a second child (our son was about a year old when we got that letter). They said to pay it back. After trying to reason with them, I gave up and payed them the refund from the next year to get rid of them. I guess that was a grave mistake because they have been on my back ever since whenever they get the chance. My son is 32 now! Every time, I'm due refund. That doesnt matter to them they just start bugging about another year.

I have been overwhelmed and disorganized in my life for some time now. When my daughter was fighting in Iraq in 2003 I became pregnant and I never told my husband because I knew I would lose the child. I'd wanted more children for our entire marriage, but miscarriages always put an end to it. I thank God every day for my two. Now my husband lives 200 miles away from me. He has to be there for our daughter who has PTSD; and I have to be here for Mom and my new stepdad. Sometimes we don't know if we are together or not but we are always friends.

My mom says she hasn't done her taxes since my first step dad passed away in the 90's!!! I definitely did not know that. Now I don't have enough help to take care of her and my new stepdad, and Mom doesn't understand if I'm not there all my waking hours. She has been diagnosed with dementia, so she is extremely unreasonabe about some things. Anone who talks to her in passing would never know. I haven't even told her that she has it. She would never believe me anyway.

My household goods have been packed away for nine years; together with the 2002 tax return that I found and just lost again. Eight and a half of those years I took care of Mom, and that's why my household stuff was packed away for so long. My husband had one bedroom of furniture; then our daughter divorced her husband, moved in with him and brought her household stuff. Our son ended up moving back in with him too. Then he was out of commission for about a year when he tore his achilles' tendon. Somewhere in this pile of mess here I WILL find my 2002 return! It's too much stuff because Mom left most of her furniture and household stuff here when she got married. My husband helps me financially when he can, but he is helping to keep our daughter afloat too. I have been selling my clothing and other things in the house to help myself.

That's about half the story but enough of bending you guys' ears, and I really thank you for caring and giving me suggestions. This too shall pass!

I sympathize, and realize you've got your hands full. I also appreciate that your priorities have been your family, even when your own health has not been well.

Taxes and the IRS are finite. Once on your back, if not cleared through accurate and timely returns, they will likely always be on your back. I believe you are correct that the IRS will only pay refunds for the previous three years. The flip side is that they can go back in years indefinitely, if they suspect "fraud", whether in fact, there is any.

By no means, am I offering advice for you to accept at face value. However, I suggest you not concern yourself with your mother's taxes at this point, unless she has a significant estate. This would include her husband's assets or liabilities, unless there are legal documents to the contrary. I do think it is worth your time, and peace of mind, to clean your own house. Frankly, whether the IRS, or State agencies, are receptive is a total crap shoot, depending on the agent who answers the phone or reviews the returns. It will require perseverance, but will get that monkey off your back.

Mert, do you know if IRS has any kind of 'customer advocacy' program to work through situations such as this? It would seem like a reasonable program for them to have where there appears to be no great amount of money involved, no appearance of deceit or intent to deceive but just 'life has happened'.

There is no known. Could be good, bad or ugly. Some taxpayers pay thousands of dollars, up front, for an advocate or tax resolution specialist, who never take them one step forward. The IRS has advocates. Also, there are Enrolled Agents, who may be CPAs or may work at a tax service. EAs are certified, trained, and authorized to represent taxpayers before the IRS. Some "resolutionists" will charge a contingency. Again, all are a total crap shoot. If one is fortunate enough to enter the right office, or get the right person to answer the phone, it's a cause for celebration. I suggest staying away from AARP, et al, who are volunteers, not available outside of tax season, should the need arise.

Taxpayers in need, have to be tough, harsh, interrogative, and absolutely willing to walk away when it doesn't feel right.

I recognize that there are 'the good, the bad and the ugly' and certainly the few folks I know of who went for a private 'tax resolution specialist' got shafted royally. That was why I was wondering about an advocacy service from IRS itself. And as for AARP and the guys who show up at the public library, they are just helping file a simple and timely return, so that is not what is needed here.

The IRS does have taxpayer advocates. The Tax Advocate Service is independent, but works within the IRS. It's free and available in every State. Contact information is on the IRS website.