I'm amazed that so many people can justify dude throwing my apple donation back at me.

Frankly, I don't give a crap about his teeth or his oral hygiene. All he had to do was say, "No thanks."

@HonnyBrown wrote:

I'm amazed that so many people can justify dude throwing my apple donation back at me.

Frankly, I don't give a crap about his teeth or his oral hygiene. All he had to do was say, "No thanks."

I agree. There is no excuse for that type of behavior. Maybe he had some mental issues going on as well. Still, that was really rude and I'm sorry you were treated like that for trying to do something nice.

Hi All Sorry to say that but I mean no disrespect or any harm and I mean to educate and share my knowledge to Good. But some people lack what I call Street Credit. It is the ability to function when faced with something unfamiliar. OK, I will ask what factor moved you to act and give the apple away? Did you feel sorry for the human being? Did you resent the fact that he was there in his condition? Was it to make you feel better about yourself that you have done a good deed? OK so for whatever the reason was, the action was taken and the reaction from the homeless was unexpected. Why was it unexpected? Do you think that because you "think" you were doing something "nice" towards another that you should receive an award? What if an apple represented something awful to the homeless in his or her mind an apple may represent something other than what you think an apple is. What if he or she has been eating apples and nothing but apples to and he or she would have preferred a banana instead for example. We tend to project our belief systems onto others so that we can justify what we see. Moreover did your body language match your altruistic thoughts when you gave the apple away? If the person was sitting or lying down did you stand tall above them and extend your arm with the apple ( saying I am better than you are) or did you lean or squat and get down to their eye level and have your hand face up with the apple on it for him or her to grab and take (saying I am here for you and if you want that apple you may have it) giving them the power to accept your gift? Did you simply give the apple and skidadle away or did you take your time and chat for a minute?

Consider this: being homeless is not the natural state for human beings. We have basic needs and shelter is one of them. See Abraham Maslow and what he said about our needs to understand what I am talking about here. So just like 99% of the people who you know have houses to go to and live in and seek shelter in when needed, there are these 1% among us for various reasons who do not fit that scenario. Soldiers returned from the battle after seeing humanity's worst side fall into a state of mind that make them shun society. People with mental illness have been shunned by society and then you have people who the System have failed and end up in a worst position than ever.

These are the main groups that make up our homeless population. Oh you can sprinkle the occasional run away rebellion teenage boy or girl but these pampered souls soon end up in one of three situations: A) they realize how tough it is so they go back to where they came from, Get exploited by the Alpha dominating elements of this population and they end up either drugged until halusination state = mental issues or C) the worst give up and vomit suicide.

So if you see someone who has survived homelessness what is it that gives you the idea that he or she even needs your help? Will you be there tomorrow or the next day? NO!!! So they can't count on you the only constant thing is themselves. No one is going to help them but themselves. They have been rejected so many times before they know it by heart. They survive and will continue to survive because there are people out there who care enough to learn about what is it that they need. And an apple is not what they need.

So yes life is of different colors, and when you want your colors to be the only colors you see well you miss a lot of what is around you.

Sorry if this has been jarring but please if you do not know EXACTLY how to deal with a human being that is different than what you feel your "normal" should be then DON'T. Do not impose your belief system on me or anyone else. It's not one size fits all, and to each his or her own and let's leave it at that. If you are curious or want to learn about someone, OPEN your mind, let all your preconceived ideas out and be READY to ACCEPT or not a new reality. This is how we grow in knowledge.

Thank you
PS: The only reason for helping should be helping, for the poster who asked about the reason

I'm not reading your manifesto in its entirety, but I offered him an apple because he was panhandling at the bus stop saying that he needed money for food. I gave him an apple that I had in my backpack. When I walked to the bus, he threw it at my back.

He was in need, and I tried to help. I didn't ask for a reward. I didn't make conversation with him. Why would I?

@HonnyBrown wrote:

I'm not reading your manifesto in its entirety, but I offered him an apple because he was panhandling at the bus stop saying that he needed money for food. I gave him an apple that I had in my backpack. When I walked to the bus, he threw it at my back.

He was in need, and I tried to help. I didn't ask for a reward. I didn't make conversation with him. Why would I?

Because he is a human being. Where is your humanity?

ETA: Nice way to welcome a new member to the forum. Blatantly saying that you are "not reading your manifesto" was quite snarky and rude.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/25/2017 09:55PM by Sybil2.

@Phil wrote:

What if an apple represented something awful to the homeless in his or her mind an apple may represent something other than what you think an apple is. What if he or she has been eating apples and nothing but apples to and he or she would have preferred a banana instead for example.

It is funny/ironic that you brought up the apple versus banana scenario. I usually have a variety of fruit or snacks in my vehicle/cooler. I have given the needy an option of an apple or a banana several times. The majority of the time, they choose the banana.

Many homeless people have bad teeth/gums so the banana being soft is a lot easier for them to eat. If the banana is quite ripe, it is usually sweeter than an apple. Bananas are much higher in potassium than apples which men seem t appreciate.

My humanity is obvious in the the fact that I offered the man an apple when he needed food. There was no need for me to speak with him.

I was neither snarky or rude. I didn't call him a troll, like you would do, and have done on so many occasions.

@Sybil2 wrote:

@HonnyBrown wrote:

I'm not reading your manifesto in its entirety, but I offered him an apple because he was panhandling at the bus stop saying that he needed money for food. I gave him an apple that I had in my backpack. When I walked to the bus, he threw it at my back.

He was in need, and I tried to help. I didn't ask for a reward. I didn't make conversation with him. Why would I?

Because he is a human being. Where is your humanity?

ETA: Nice way to welcome a new member to the forum. Blatantly saying that you are "not reading your manifesto" was quite snarky and rude.

HA! Thanks for the laugh!

HB clearly read the entire post. Way back in this thread I challenged her sense of humanity, her response was just as selfish.

I do not know the term, but there is a term for someone that just keeps repeating themselves when anyone questions them or their motives. Self examination and discipline requires one to go beyond self.

So a homeless person did not appreciate a small gift of food. While it was rude, who knows or cares why he behaved as he did? Who knows or cares what HB's motive was for offering the apple? The posts are starting to sound like a broken record. If the apple was truly given unselfishly, why the need for validation of appreciation? Why post over and over to convince others of humanity and unselfishness? Why is this still dragging on?

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/26/2017 06:05AM by roflwofl.

@roflwofl wrote:

Why is this still dragging on?

Because the forum has become so boring lately that this thread has become the highlight of some people's lives. Sad really.

@roflwofl wrote:

So a homeless person did not appreciate a small gift of food. While it was rude, who knows or cares why he behaved as he did? Who knows or cares what HB's motive was for offering the apple? The posts are starting to sound like a broken record. If the apple was truly given unselfishly, why the need for validation of appreciation? Why post over and over to convince others of humanity and unselfishness? Why is this still dragging on?

Because those, that are passionate about serving and helping those in need, are trying to provide valuable insight. The majority of the posts are new to the thread and many lurkers have participated. I am gleaning from the compassionate and personal sharing. Only one person appears to have an agenda to try and end the thread on what obviously many see as a negative.

@HonnyBrown wrote:

I'm not reading your manifesto in its entirety, but I offered him an apple because he was panhandling at the bus stop saying that he needed money for food. I gave him an apple that I had in my backpack. When I walked to the bus, he threw it at my back.

He was in need, and I tried to help. I didn't ask for a reward. I didn't make conversation with him. Why would I?

Sorry HonnyBrown

I see I may have offended you, but understand that this issue is so close to me, having been homeless due to the passing of my loved one so soon after I moved to stay with her, and for 8 months I tried everything (legally) under the sun to get into a shelter and the system failed me. One of my homeless veteran who was protecting me and educating me on the ways of how to survive told me "swallow your pride, the next person who passes by, I want you to stick this knife like this and ask them for their money, then you follow them and give them the money back, and tell them to not tell the cops" it was a petty crime for me to go to jail. I refused. Just as my luck would be, the next passer by were two police officers in full uniform and one undercover in plain cloths.

The guys yelled at me don't do it. I was so clumsy the cops knew what was going on, and instead took me to a shelter. I got a 7-night voucher for a bed, but then I was separated from my protector, and the "vultures" were looking at the "fresh meat" I had access to a computer, thus I could work for hours, and eventually I ended up sending thousands of job applications and one got me a job, and lifted me out of this mess that I found myself in.

The one common thing that I would say, is that People stereotype homeless individuals in the first 2 seconds. Eyes before brain syndrome I call it. You see, but you don't understand. Think of the outcome had I had a rookie, uncaring, unobservant, under cover officer that day? He knew from dealing with homeless individuals how the act, behave, when they zig and when they zag, and I did not fit the mold, and he was intreagued by what he saw me doing. He knew that I did not belong, no one does actually, and he was in a position to help.

If just like you, this officer, who is now my best friend and we keep in touch and anytime the department needs volunteers I'm there, did not talk to the homeless how would we know the full story. I'm running out of time, I have to go out for an assignment soon, but in NYC there was this story about this music theater ensemble members all of them came from the street. They recently performed at Carnegie Hall to a sold out house.

The sign said Money or Food, money was first why did you not give money? I do not advocate this approach but it was an option. What I am trying to get to hear is that People need to tread homeless People like People and nothing else. If you cut me I'll bleed red blood just like anyone else. I am like you, you are like me.

One difference I was tested, I went to a dark place, I survived, I returned, and I learned from the experience. You have not yet. I hope that you help someone for the sake of helping, Habitat for Humanity is a great organization get plugged in again and do what you can through them.

And for the poster who drove the nice car, who had the debit card, who was the smarter of the two? You or the "homeless"?

Thank You for your reply.

No worries!

@Wassim wrote:

@HonnyBrown wrote:

I'm not reading your manifesto in its entirety, but I offered him an apple because he was panhandling at the bus stop saying that he needed money for food. I gave him an apple that I had in my backpack. When I walked to the bus, he threw it at my back.

He was in need, and I tried to help. I didn't ask for a reward. I didn't make conversation with him. Why would I?

Sorry HonnyBrown

I see I may have offended you, but understand that this issue is so close to me, having been homeless due to the passing of my loved one so soon after I moved to stay with her, and for 8 months I tried everything (legally) under the sun to get into a shelter and the system failed me.

@Wassim, are you Phil from the "manifesto" post? I am not sure why you are apologizing unless you are the same person.

FYI without canned foods, the exploration of the Arctic and Antarctic may have been significantly delayed. And ultimately it may have been the canned food that did them in. Lead solder was the culprit. And the relationship between fresh, frozen and canned is complex. For long term storage, it is hard to beat canned as the process inactivates enzymes in vegetables which causes degradation of the plant.

Was the apple a Granny Smith?

retro, this was over twenty years ago when I was in college. I am pretty sure it was a HoneyCrisp apple. I like those. There is one in my backpack now.

It feels very bad when there is some one who is homeless and hungry. It was a day, when I ordered lunch from online and I started having, then suddenly I saw a small boy staring me. I understood he was hungry so I offered him my lunch. Ahhh....it was a happy moment. As I shop only by using Coupons, so that it never costs me more. And it gave me double happiness. Saving money while spreading happiness. If I get another chance of donating food, clothes etc I would definitely do it.

Inappropriate post removed. – Admin

Why was my post deleted? It was a question.

questions can be inappropriate.

Inappropriate to ask someone why they post a sob story about a friend, but aren't willing to help themselves? Or just "inappropriate" to ask that person? How come this place is so one-sided about things?

I try to avoid doing fast food or junk food shops.... However, if the pay is right and I don't actually have to eat it.... I'll buy whatever I'm supposed to purchase, photograph it (or whatever) and give it to homeless folks... It's kind of fun to go through a Krispy Kreme drive through, make the mandatory purchase of a dozen doughnuts and deliver them to a a group of homeless folks.