This tags on to a discussion in the Shopping Company section, but I thought it worth posting as a topic of its own. I hear people wonder (not just here, but in other situations as well) how it was that their report or essay or other document was marked down for spelling and grammar because, well, they used spell-check! How could it be wrong? Here's how:

"Deer Editor, your always pointing out what Ivey don’t wrong, but ewe never tell me when its write."

I wrote that to point out to somebody once that you can't rely on spell-check to proofread your work. That mess wasn't flagged by spell-check at all. Nothing is misspelled, the punctuation is correct, and the grammar is fine.

The only way you can be sure that what you wrote is what you meant to write is through old-fashioned proofreading -- with your own brain and eyes. If you're unsure of a spelling or usage, look it up. Don't trust spell-check, predictive text, auto-correct, and so on. There are wonderful resources that can help you if you're not sure how to punctuate something, whether to use compliment or complement, if the correct usage is "I spell poor" or "I spell poorly," etc. Spellings are easy look-ups, but there are great grammar sites, too. I use hard-copy style guides, but when I don't have one at hand, I use the Purdue Owl (https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/purdue_owl.html). It's more professional and accurate than many popular online guides written by self-styled experts. Some know what they're doing; some don't.

Yes! Those are called "wordos" instead of typos by some. Back in the day the following sentence was left in a proposal for a multi million dollar contract to conduct an economic analysis (study) for the US Dept of labor, "The stud will be led by Dr. (insert my name), whose experience in the field is (insert some superlative)."

Miraculously, we won the contract, but I had to put up with being "Director of the Stud," for a long time!

@walesmaven wrote:

Miraculously, we won the contract, but I had to put up with being "Director of the Stud," for a long time!

And did he obey unquestioningly? That could be fun....

BTW, Birdy, your auto-signature is wonderfully appropriate!

@Opanel wrote:

BTW, Birdy, your auto-signature is wonderfully appropriate!

Opanel, that mistake is, by far, my biggest pet peeve! So few people nowadays seem to know the difference between every day and everyday. In fact, the former seems to be becoming extinct, and it makes me crazy. I write an occasional blog-type grammar rant on my Facebook page, and I wrote one about that. And have repeated it because the situation has gotten worse! Is it really that difficult? I don't think it should be, and everybody was taught the difference in school!

(Then there's "alot," but I won't even get into that! LOL.)

Id. Do you know how many ids I find in my narratives? Too many! It's a word, but not the one I wanted. We need to move the S farther from the D or just obliterate the word "id" altogether!

Id and ego...we couldn't do without them.

@JASFLALMT wrote:

Id and ego...we couldn't do without them.

LOL. If only we could get our ids off the keyboard....

I just read an anecdote in which a child’s parents were “beat red.” That’s either a mistake or I need more details!

@1cent wrote:

I just read an anecdote in which a child’s parents were “beat red.” That’s either a mistake or I need more details!

Where's the "wow" icon? I wonder if the child did the beating or another party. With what were they beat? Whip? Wet noodle?

Yes; more detail needed!

@BirdyC wrote:

@1cent wrote:

I just read an anecdote in which a child’s parents were “beat red.” That’s either a mistake or I need more details!

Where's the "wow" icon? I wonder if the child did the beating or another party. With what were they beat? Whip? Wet noodle?

Yes; more detail needed!

Marijuana stalks from a harvested plant.

My very first text I ever sent, I did not know about "auto correct" (over 70 when I sent my first text). I texted my daughter "I'm in Salt Lake City."

She received: "I'm in alcohol."

She posted it on facebook for giggles.

My working vocabulary exceeds the vocabularies of Spell-Check and auto-correct.

I still hate them both. They impede my writing.

Edited to add: I should have said "At one time, my working vocabulary exceeded..."; I'm sure it's no longer true.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/07/2019 06:15AM by ceasesmith.

@ceasesmith wrote:

I still hate them both. They impede my writing.

Edited to add: I should have said "At one time, my working vocabulary exceeded..."; I'm sure it's no longer true.

Agreed about hating them! There is an MSC that wants shoppers to use Grammarly for writing reports. Ha! Just for kicks, I installed it. I have news for y'all: Grammarly doesn't know crap. I wrote a compound sentence, which requires a comma between the clauses, and Grammarly redlined it, suggesting I omit the comma. It has also yelled at me for several other correct usages. Fie on Grammarly; I'm going to uninstall it before I kill it.

They also "dumb down" the writing. In my estimate, to about 4th or 5th grade level.

Birdy, you and I realize it -- for many people, writing at the 5th grade level is a VAST improvement.

I posted this in another thread, but it belongs here, too:

I was completing a shop today, and threw away a whole dollar on a local newspaper.

Why?

Because the headline shrieked:

"Hazardous Road Conditions Reek Havoc on Motorists".

I just HAD to bring that one home!!!

Oh, dear God. Oops; I mean deer God.

ROTFLMFAO.

@ceasesmith wrote:

"Hazardous Road Conditions Reek Havoc on Motorists".

I just HAD to bring that one home!!!

Something smells rotten about that story.

Yes, indeed!

I just HAD to read it....did a convoy of trucks carrying cattle to slaughter wreck? Is that what caused the stink?

@ceasesmith wrote:

Yes, indeed!

I just HAD to read it....did a convoy of trucks carrying cattle to slaughter wreck? Is that what caused the stink?

Must have been a hog truck; they smell much worse than cattle.