If you have a private message here, or something at the top of the page is telling you you do, click on the blue bar at the very top of the page and find your message box yourself. Someone has been running a banner ad about private messages to trick people into clicking it. It is NOT from this forum. Do NOT click anything it tries to get you to click.
I pray it does not occur that the last thing I did before I died was vacuum the house or eat broccoli.