Friends who request that you treat them to a fine dining shop
My guess is your friend views it more as an expense account dinner and does not realize the work that goes into writing a fine dining report. So yes it is somewhat offensive, but it may be based in ignorance. You could give him or her a quick lesson in the realities of mystery shopping.
Equal rights for others does not mean fewer rights for you. It's not pie.
"I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag." -Molly Ivins
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and it really annoys the pig.
"I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag." -Molly Ivins
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and it really annoys the pig.
Depends on what I'm getting in return. I have a certain friend I take on occasional fine dining shops. He's always generous with me, and I feel I owe him. Treating him to nice meals is a way for me to give back.
I also take my significant other on fine dining shops. She gives me love and s*x, so that's a pretty good arrangement.
I also take my significant other on fine dining shops. She gives me love and s*x, so that's a pretty good arrangement.
Thanks Lisa, I did just that. I told my friend that it takes about 2 hours to write the report and that is a lot of work especially late at night after our other activities. We are going someplace together at month end and she thought it would be nice if I took her to dinner before the activity but then I am stuck writing the report late at night. On top of that, I have taken her on other dining shops and she has never reciprocated with a meal. Once she did not like the casual dining restaurant and paid for half the amount over the reimbursement. She told me that she will only do fine dining with me and not casual dining.
She is way too picky and not being much of a friend. For gosh sakes, it is basically free or incredibly cheap to her and she won't take the good with bad?
Equal rights for others does not mean fewer rights for you. It's not pie.
"I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag." -Molly Ivins
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and it really annoys the pig.
"I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag." -Molly Ivins
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and it really annoys the pig.
G3B, it appears that your friend does not realize that this is a business for you and that sometimes you will encounter the bad side of things. That goes with the territory. I think you should seriously consider not taking her on any future shops. It's only a gut feeling, but I think she might blow it for you one day, i.e. "accidently" mention that you're on a shop.
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Have PV-500 & willing to travel.
"Answers are easy. It's asking the right questions which is hard." (The Fourth Doctor, The Face of Evil, 1977)
"Somedays you're the pigeon, somedays you're the statue.” J. Andrew Taylor
"I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." Galileo Galilei
Have PV-500 & willing to travel.
"Answers are easy. It's asking the right questions which is hard." (The Fourth Doctor, The Face of Evil, 1977)
"Somedays you're the pigeon, somedays you're the statue.” J. Andrew Taylor
"I have never met a man so ignorant that I couldn't learn something from him." Galileo Galilei
I've never done a fine dining shop, so I have no idea what goes into those compared to casual dining, but even for a casual dining shop, if someone were requesting I take them like that, I would say no. The amount of work that goes into any shop is worth something and she's getting food for nothing. Why should you burden yourself for someone who isn't be grateful? I can't believe she said she'd only do fine dining shops with you - how selfish.
CAscotch Wrote:
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> By chance, do you happen to have a romantic
> interest with this person?
no we are both casual friends of the same gender who have one common interest and usually see each when we get together for that activity.
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> By chance, do you happen to have a romantic
> interest with this person?
no we are both casual friends of the same gender who have one common interest and usually see each when we get together for that activity.
LisaSTL Wrote:
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> She is way too picky and not being much of a
> friend. For gosh sakes, it is basically free or
> incredibly cheap to her and she won't take the
> good with bad?
Lisa, I took her to fine dining first and then fast casual and told her bef. hand that it would not be as nice as the previous shop. I specifically told her that this one (fast casual) was done as an accommodation for the same scheduler as the fine dining one bec. she needed to get things done by month end. I had already warned her about taking the good with the bad.
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> She is way too picky and not being much of a
> friend. For gosh sakes, it is basically free or
> incredibly cheap to her and she won't take the
> good with bad?
Lisa, I took her to fine dining first and then fast casual and told her bef. hand that it would not be as nice as the previous shop. I specifically told her that this one (fast casual) was done as an accommodation for the same scheduler as the fine dining one bec. she needed to get things done by month end. I had already warned her about taking the good with the bad.
If it's a just a platonic friend, I think a FD meal as a guest deserves some sort of reciprocation.
Not all of my friends have the money to take me out for FD meal themselves, but all of them will usually offer to help out in some other way. I've been taken to luxury boxes for sports games, had my house cleaned, gotten a free pet-sitter for a weekend away, a ride to the airport, etc.
Now...I've never had to request that my friends reciprocate for the meal experience. It's always just been understood.
Not all of my friends have the money to take me out for FD meal themselves, but all of them will usually offer to help out in some other way. I've been taken to luxury boxes for sports games, had my house cleaned, gotten a free pet-sitter for a weekend away, a ride to the airport, etc.
Now...I've never had to request that my friends reciprocate for the meal experience. It's always just been understood.
If I were in your shoes, I would be somewhat offended in the beginning and probably be so disgusted by this point that I would stop hanging out with this "friend." Selfish, inconsiderate, entitled piece of work.
As we say in New Zealand - cheeky cow! I think she's totally taking advantage of you.
She wouldn't know my next assignment.
My mom who is also my baby sitter and support system does not even do this. She does say which shop she will skip out on. We got Red Lobster twice and that is the on she keeps asking about because it is her favorite. She also feels us shoppers aren't paid enough. LOL But she does not request I take her all the time.
My mom who is also my baby sitter and support system does not even do this. She does say which shop she will skip out on. We got Red Lobster twice and that is the on she keeps asking about because it is her favorite. She also feels us shoppers aren't paid enough. LOL But she does not request I take her all the time.
I usually take my hubby on FD, but have taken a really good girlfriend who have paid for overnight hotels when we have girls' night out. If we go over an hour's drive away for FD, she would drive, which is fair.
Not my circus - Not my monkeys @(*.*)@
~Polish Proverb~
~Polish Proverb~
I am so disgusted also. Several of my so-called friends have no idea what it takes to do these reports. They are
more than happy to eat but there is no reciprocation. They consider it a "free" meal. Yeah, free for them not for me
It is the same as working elsewhere such as a bank, etc and then go out for dinner. The bank gives you a paycheck and
you spend.
I only take my hubby from now on.....Oh and btw, they all say they will treat next time and next time never happens.
Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. I am glad I am not the only one.
more than happy to eat but there is no reciprocation. They consider it a "free" meal. Yeah, free for them not for me
It is the same as working elsewhere such as a bank, etc and then go out for dinner. The bank gives you a paycheck and
you spend.
I only take my hubby from now on.....Oh and btw, they all say they will treat next time and next time never happens.
Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. I am glad I am not the only one.
Part of the reason I am disgusted by this "friend" doesn't even have anything to do with the amount of work we (shoppers) had to put in to get the FD shop in the first place (e.g. applying to MSCs, building a good work history) or what we must do for a particular FD shop (e.g. reading the guidelines and form, being "on the job" during the meal and not being able to simply enjoy the meal, writing the report). It has everything to do with the piss-poor attitude of the "friend."
Who is she to expect or demand preferential treatment from G3B? Graceless twit.
Who is she to expect or demand preferential treatment from G3B? Graceless twit.
Why don't you help your friend sign up to shop with the same company? Suggest your friend take you out as you will be happy to coach them about the instructions and report writing the first time. Let them carry the burden for a change - you'll be happy to tag along, right?
Shopping since 1995; full-time since 2009. Blogging about shopping on www.myfrugalmiser.com.
I'm still curious as to why shoppers are so against asking their eating partner to chip in for the meal. Even I, who told my friends that we'd split anything over the reimbursement limit or the entire thing if the shop got rejected, have balked at asking for my "guest" to chip in. But why? I'm not getting a free meal. I'm observing, writing stuff down, risking my money, and putting in significant time to write a report.
I mean, if my friend said, "Hey, come have this meal with me. It'll cost $200, but you just need to give me $50," I'd probably jump at the chance.
I mean, if my friend said, "Hey, come have this meal with me. It'll cost $200, but you just need to give me $50," I'd probably jump at the chance.
I have a friend who asked me to take a hardware store job that her ex-boyfriend manages and give them a really bad report because his bonus depended on it. (The break up went badly.) I told her that I was bound by my ICA to be honest and that if I gave them an unfairly bad report, they would contest it and check the video, talk to employees, etc. She was surprised that businesses take it so seriously and that I could get in trouble. People just don't get it.
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I'm "Sandi" in the Middle!
I'm "Sandi" in the Middle!
My opinion is the friend should not know that you are mystery/secret shopper.
To me that is asking for trouble, which seems to already be happening.
Just my opinion.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/07/2013 03:23AM by cruiseguy.
To me that is asking for trouble, which seems to already be happening.
Just my opinion.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/07/2013 03:23AM by cruiseguy.
If I am dining before an event at night, I don't take fine dining shops because usually the reports are so tedious (BJs is one of the exceptions - easy report). I don't want to come home from a fun night out and be faced with a long report.
I'd tell her you no longer do fine dining shops before a night on the town. So it's either a casual or fast food shop, or a no-shop dinner where you split the bill.
If she balks, she's not really that good of a friend.....
I'd tell her you no longer do fine dining shops before a night on the town. So it's either a casual or fast food shop, or a no-shop dinner where you split the bill.
If she balks, she's not really that good of a friend.....
NOTE: I'm not on the forum every day. If someone comments on my post, I might not reply right away. I've been a shopper since 1991. I've never done any work for a MS company in any other capacity.
I would "cool" my relationship with this unappreciative friend.
The "friend" who actually got me involved in mystery shopping got mad at me because I ended up being successful at it. He accused me of "stealing" all his jobs including FD. And he kept saying that I owe him so I should take him on all my FD shops. I did take him once as a thank-you for introducing me to MS'ing but I think once is enough.
He ended up blabbing about MS'ing to anyone and everyone especially when he was drinking. Just to shut him up, I told him months ago that I quit MS'ing because it wasn't paying off for me. That stopped all the harassment.
Now I take my boyfriend. At first he didn't understand all the work that goes into a FD shop so I ended up putting him to work. He takes the timings for me and does the bar portion if necessary. He also checks out the restroom and writes a brief description of his food. Now he has a better appreciation of FD MS'ing.
He ended up blabbing about MS'ing to anyone and everyone especially when he was drinking. Just to shut him up, I told him months ago that I quit MS'ing because it wasn't paying off for me. That stopped all the harassment.
Now I take my boyfriend. At first he didn't understand all the work that goes into a FD shop so I ended up putting him to work. He takes the timings for me and does the bar portion if necessary. He also checks out the restroom and writes a brief description of his food. Now he has a better appreciation of FD MS'ing.
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“I'm the one that's got to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.”
~ Jimi Hendrix
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” ~ Mark Twain
“To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.” ~ J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
“I'm the one that's got to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life the way I want to.”
~ Jimi Hendrix
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.” ~ Mark Twain
“To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.” ~ J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
The definition of a toxic friend is someone who thinks they are entitled to YOUR life. Sounds like she does!
Let me be the other side of the coin. People not in the "business" really have no clue what we have to do on the professional side of things. They have no idea its late night reporting for hours with trying to make all our answers perfect so the report gets accepted by sometimes picky editors. All they see is that we get paid to go eat at really nice places. Heck if I was tagging alone would I prefer Fine dining over the Casual fare. You bet I would. And I would think that this is free for you so why expect me to pay any portion. This friend may just be bad news and not worth the time figuring things out with them. But if this friend is just talking because they have no clue what really goes on then maybe some explaining might be the better course. You have to figure out if this friend is worth keeping as your companion on mystery shops or ditch them just for peace of mind.
Just my two cents. But I do agree.. CheekyCow
Just my two cents. But I do agree.. CheekyCow
I'm surprised people here tell their friends. Outside of my husband, father and two siblings, no one else knows what I do with my down time.
I don't have to deal with this because I don't blab about what I do to the handful of friends who possess the "user" trait. You have the power to say yes or no to your friend especially if you see they are just hanging around for you to take them out and not return the favour.
We often say to people how awesome MS is - free stuff, more than minimum wage (sometimes 10x that amount) just to evaluate someone - but rarely do people actually say what is truly involved (lengthy reports, typing, scanning, etc,). It's good to be positive but sometimes you have to be real about the situation.
I don't have to deal with this because I don't blab about what I do to the handful of friends who possess the "user" trait. You have the power to say yes or no to your friend especially if you see they are just hanging around for you to take them out and not return the favour.
We often say to people how awesome MS is - free stuff, more than minimum wage (sometimes 10x that amount) just to evaluate someone - but rarely do people actually say what is truly involved (lengthy reports, typing, scanning, etc,). It's good to be positive but sometimes you have to be real about the situation.
Silver Certified ~ Shopping all of Toronto and beyond
G3B Wrote:
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> Thanks Lisa, I did just that. I told my friend
> that it takes about 2 hours to write the report
> and that is a lot of work especially late at night
> after our other activities. We are going someplace
> together at month end and she thought it would be
> nice if I took her to dinner before the activity
> but then I am stuck writing the report late at
> night. On top of that, I have taken her on other
> dining shops and she has never reciprocated with a
> meal. Once she did not like the casual dining
> restaurant and paid for half the amount over the
> reimbursement. She told me that she will only do
> fine dining with me and not casual dining.
This does not sound like a friend. Screw her.
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> Thanks Lisa, I did just that. I told my friend
> that it takes about 2 hours to write the report
> and that is a lot of work especially late at night
> after our other activities. We are going someplace
> together at month end and she thought it would be
> nice if I took her to dinner before the activity
> but then I am stuck writing the report late at
> night. On top of that, I have taken her on other
> dining shops and she has never reciprocated with a
> meal. Once she did not like the casual dining
> restaurant and paid for half the amount over the
> reimbursement. She told me that she will only do
> fine dining with me and not casual dining.
This does not sound like a friend. Screw her.
I am happy to take my husband on fine dining shops. He understands what is required of me before, during and after the shop. Sometimes I take my best friend on a fine dining shop. She also understands that I do this as work and that I am happy to share the benefit of the shop with her. She will usually offer to pay for drinks or for the tip, even knowing that I need the receipts.
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