I think a much more interesting question would be: When I was doing the crazy things I was required to do for a shop, Security pulled me into the office and accused me of shoplifting. They searched my purse and pockets, found nothing and let me go with only a perfunctory apology. Should I put this in my report?
Hypothetically OP is a bridge dweller. Hypothetically he craves attention. Hypothetically he is laughing his ass off while admiring his work here. Realistically a moderator should close this thread.
Dante, It is still a hypothetical. In reality I think that should that ever happen to me I would bail on it being a shop, ask for some proof of their accusations before allowing them to search anything and sue the heck out of them for detaining me and searching my property when they found nothing.
I've done a grocery shop where I had to "steal" something on the bottom of my cart to see if the cashier noticed. That got my heart rate going for sure. So yeah, I've wondered what would happen.
I would think that's rather like acting as a witness against yourself, which is deemed unconstitutional by the Fifth Amendment.