Very interesting forum name..... good one!

@poppabear wrote:

MountainCacher88 Just to clarify, bisexual are folks who are both active with men and women, Transgender would be ones who are transitioning or born with one gender and identifying as another.

Hi, I'm new to this and just sort of reading and taking it all in...hope this isn't out of order what I'm asking... when you say it sounds fishy...are there assignments that are "fishy" and what exactly does that mean? As a new shopper should I be screening my assignments a certain kind of way?

I would definitely feel uncomfortable with this. Also, how exactly do you just work your gender into a conversation with a bartender? "Oh hey I'm ___ and I'm trans. I'll take a jack and coke please." Awkward.

I get what they are trying to do, but I feel like for this shop to really work, you would literally have to be a trans person who just does this as life.

Um, I think by fishy (someone correct me if I'm wrong) they are referring to a shop with less than clear instructions. Like, they are unsure what the purpose is or how exactly to go about it. Anyone else want to jump in on this?

Thank you...that makes me feel better. Fishy to me makes me think possible scam...things like that. You know you hear so much. But reading everyone's threads has really built my confidence in this quite a bit. I'm really looking forward to getting involved and making this work.
Thanks so much for your input.

@poppabear wrote:

MountainCacher88 Just to clarify, bisexual are folks who are both active with men and women, Transgender would be ones who are transitioning or born with one gender and identifying as another.

I know the difference in the LGBTQ and others in the spectrum, but I'm unsure how one would just go have a drink at a bar and portray this unless they were asked to be flamboyant or dressed a particular way. If I just saw Anderson Cooper out at a bar, I wouldn't immediately know he was gay man unless he told me. Are shoppers supposed to blatantly make comments to the barkeep? I couldn't imagine how that would go down? Just chit chat with them and talk about your lesbian or gay partner so they know you're gay? I only meant that in my initial comments that the directions might go better if they ask us to just specifically portray ourselves as transgender, or to present ourselves as someone who dresses as the opposite sex for the shop or to just flat out tell us to use the restroom of the opposite gender and if confronted, identify as the opposite gender? I'd have to actually read the full guidelines to get a better feel on these shops. I have three feet of hair and a very feminine shape. I'd stand out immediately on the way to the men's room if anyone was watching or paying attention.

Why not just ask the barkeep if they have bathrooms to accommodate and see where it goes? Maybe dress in a manner that can make them wonder? Sometimes just being plain and nondescript is just enough.

I wonder why they want the information. In Austin, everybody uses both bathrooms all the time. Many are gender neutral. Other parts of Texas, NOT and you might get beat up or killed. I work with a lot of LGBT, some you would never guess.

I don't understand all the speculation. If you are so curious to find out the shopper scenario, apply for the job or contact the scheduler. All these "what ifs" are just a waste of time.

The laws will determine weather a trans will be able to use whatever bathroom. Why do we have to do it...
very good question and a good debate. The forum is for discussing, if no one did, well we wouldn't need a forum, would we? I will say, they better pay more than 10$ for that job, or I wouldn't do it, would you, I'd say that should be a 50$ job. This s a subject that most shoppers know nothing about, it is all speculation, so how else do we learn, if we don't speculate or discuss.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/11/2017 03:47PM by Irene_L.A..

@Irene_L.A. wrote:

The laws will determine weather a trans will be able to use whatever bathroom. Why do we have to do it...
very good question and a good debate. The forum is for discussing, if no one did, well we wouldn't need a forum, would we? I will say, they better pay more than 10$ for that job, or I wouldn't do it, would you, I'd say that should be a 50$ job. This s a subject that most shoppers know nothing about, it is all speculation, so how else do we learn, if we don't speculate or discuss.

I believe the OP said it was a $150 payment, so someone finds it valuable information :-) For $150, I'd be willing to try it out. I don't think I'd gather any valuable info though. Probably have a chit chat with the bartender, and then go pee, and no one would even notice.

@MountainCacher88 wrote:

@Irene_L.A. wrote:

The laws will determine weather a trans will be able to use whatever bathroom. Why do we have to do it...
very good question and a good debate. The forum is for discussing, if no one did, well we wouldn't need a forum, would we? I will say, they better pay more than 10$ for that job, or I wouldn't do it, would you, I'd say that should be a 50$ job. This s a subject that most shoppers know nothing about, it is all speculation, so how else do we learn, if we don't speculate or discuss.

I believe the OP said it was a $150 payment, so someone finds it valuable information :-) For $150, I'd be willing to try it out. I don't think I'd gather any valuable info though. Probably have a chit chat with the bartender, and then go pee, and no one would even notice.

Well then, 150.00 changes everything,

Haha. I would have to agree. $25 reimbursement for the food plus $150 shop payment.

I happen to be a very feminine lesbian( married to a women who often gets mistaken for a dude when she has short hair). I would NEVER use the men's restroom( unless it was a single bathroom and i was running it to pee). I probably could not do this shop. My wife could, however she is a police sgt and told me that she thinks people could get arrested for this.

@mlzg wrote:

I don't know how I would represent myself as a member of the LGBTQ community without being very awkward...even though I'm gay myself. What?

Also, you don't necessarily have to look a certain way to be trans or GNC. The beginning part of those instructions (represent yourself...) is silly to me, but I understand the rest of it. However, depending on who is around, the area, etc., it could possibly be a dangerous situation.

Looks like someone still has not toggled me or has untoggled me. Not a good thing.

I toggled you!

Haha...those are my thoughts, easy $150? But just because I'm thinking they are looking for organic data..do just like the assignment says and get the responses necessary for the analysts. I could be wrong.

For that amount of money, no

There are things I will do and things I won't do.... I've tried to bribe a a wire transfer guy.... I've portrayed myself as being potentially affiliated with a drug cartel.... I've asked questions that would suggest that I have issues with folks of ethnicities other than my own... I've bought $5 worth of gas at six different gas stations..... I've pretended to be low income just minutes after pretending I'm in the market for a Ferrari...

This one, I just would not do... With my luck, they'd figure out that I was lying and I'd find myself in handcuffs....

Backpage?

@SteveSoCal wrote:

@walesmaven wrote:

But if that is what is wanted, why not just recruit accordingly?

You mean craigslist?

@calicakes wrote:

I happen to be a very feminine lesbian( married to a women who often gets mistaken for a dude when she has short hair). I would NEVER use the men's restroom( unless it was a single bathroom and i was running it to pee). I probably could not do this shop. My wife could, however she is a police sgt and told me that she thinks people could get arrested for this.

@mlzg wrote:

I don't know how I would represent myself as a member of the LGBTQ community without being very awkward...even though I'm gay myself. What?

Also, you don't necessarily have to look a certain way to be trans or GNC. The beginning part of those instructions (represent yourself...) is silly to me, but I understand the rest of it. However, depending on who is around, the area, etc., it could possibly be a dangerous situation.

People don't realize that gay people are nurses...doctors...police officers, mechanics. They're just people.
I'm still vastly ignorant on the subject, I admit it. I'm from an older generation, where we just don't talk about this sort of stuff. I remember having an uncle who was "one of nature's bachelors" -- I now know that's the "genteel" reference. Now, as an older, and I hope wiser, person, I think if you find someone who loves you and who you love, in every sense of the word, you're a very fortunate person.

As for the shop itself, if one enters a gay or lesbian bar, isn't that, all by itself, presenting yourself as a member of that community? If you're in one of those places, and look around you, don't you assume every one else is there by choice?

That being said, there's not enough money in the world to pay me to go into a men's room. In the shops where I have to get photos of the men's room, I get a manager to go with me, knock on the door, clear the place out, and hold the door open long enough for me to get the required photos. Which I take from the doorway. If the photos are not adequate, tough -- I won't get paid for the shop, and someone else will have to re-do the shop.

I do not know why I am this way. It is just, I am.

You just never know what subject will come up in the forum, do you?

Interesting discussion.

Hey ceases,

Actually, a lot of cis hetero folks frequent gay bars. At least by me. Reasons can vary such as: straight women not wanting to get hit on by men/feeling safer, you have friends who are LGBTQ, or it's just nearby. Some are very curious. I know a lot of straight women who have had their bachelorette parties at gay bars and think it's the most exciting thing ever. I'm sure there are other reasons as well.

I'm in my 30's and in NYC. Up until very recently (past 5 years), people would act very shocked to find out I'm not straight. "But you're a teacher!" LOL makes me think of the movie: "But I'm a Cheerleader"

No one really says anything like that to me anymore. Since pretty much no one figures I'm gay when they meet me, I like to let the homophobes say ignorant things assuming I'm straight and then drop a casual "Oh my wife this and that" and watch their reaction.

@ceasesmith wrote:

@calicakes wrote:

I happen to be a very feminine lesbian( married to a women who often gets mistaken for a dude when she has short hair). I would NEVER use the men's restroom( unless it was a single bathroom and i was running it to pee). I probably could not do this shop. My wife could, however she is a police sgt and told me that she thinks people could get arrested for this.

@mlzg wrote:

I don't know how I would represent myself as a member of the LGBTQ community without being very awkward...even though I'm gay myself. What?

Also, you don't necessarily have to look a certain way to be trans or GNC. The beginning part of those instructions (represent yourself...) is silly to me, but I understand the rest of it. However, depending on who is around, the area, etc., it could possibly be a dangerous situation.

People don't realize that gay people are nurses...doctors...police officers, mechanics. They're just people.
I'm still vastly ignorant on the subject, I admit it. I'm from an older generation, where we just don't talk about this sort of stuff. I remember having an uncle who was "one of nature's bachelors" -- I now know that's the "genteel" reference. Now, as an older, and I hope wiser, person, I think if you find someone who loves you and who you love, in every sense of the word, you're a very fortunate person.

As for the shop itself, if one enters a gay or lesbian bar, isn't that, all by itself, presenting yourself as a member of that community? If you're in one of those places, and look around you, don't you assume every one else is there by choice?

That being said, there's not enough money in the world to pay me to go into a men's room. In the shops where I have to get photos of the men's room, I get a manager to go with me, knock on the door, clear the place out, and hold the door open long enough for me to get the required photos. Which I take from the doorway. If the photos are not adequate, tough -- I won't get paid for the shop, and someone else will have to re-do the shop.

I do not know why I am this way. It is just, I am.

You just never know what subject will come up in the forum, do you?

Interesting discussion.

I haven't seen the shop so I'm not sure of what the particular establishment is, but would assume if it's being tested that it's specifically not a LGBTQ friendly establishment...or what would the point be? I can't imagine there would be enforcement based on birth gender in one of those establishments. At least not here is LA.

@mlzg, you can include in your list of reasons for straight guys to visit gay bars that fact that it's a great place to meet women! I found that out by accident when I was hanging out with gay friends at a bar they like to go to. Plenty of straight women go there to dance and not get hassled by guys...and I'm happy to be the only available straight guy in that situation.

You have had positive experiences trying to hit on straight women who go to gay bars hoping not to get hit on?

I'm definitely confused, lol.

@SteveSoCal wrote:

I haven't seen the shop so I'm not sure of what the particular establishment is, but would assume if it's being tested that it's specifically not a LGBTQ friendly establishment...or what would the point be? I can't imagine there would be enforcement based on birth gender in one of those establishments. At least not here is LA.

@mlzg, you can include in your list of reasons for straight guys to visit gay bars that fact that it's a great place to meet women! I found that out by accident when I was hanging out with gay friends at a bar they like to go to. Plenty of straight women go there to dance and not get hassled by guys...and I'm happy to be the only available straight guy in that situation.

@mlzg wrote:

You have had positive experiences trying to hit on straight women who go to gay bars hoping not to get hit on?

I'm definitely confused, lol.

I didn't say I hit on them. I said that I had good luck meeting them!

I think women probably feel more comfortable in gay bars and may be more apt to strike up conversations with men. In my recent experience, the women I met initiated the conversation. One offered me her phone number and said that she'd like to hang out. To avoid any confusion, I explained that I was straight, to which she replied, "I know! I saw you on the dance floor..."

They might suspect you are straight; just like I have "gay-dar".

I have a question. Will any other shoppers or observers be on hand to detail reactions, perceived responses, or whatever else could be studied?

A lot of straight people go to gay bars. There are a multitude of reasons, many of which have already been listed. One that has not is, they just like the atmosphere. Even my straight laced sister went to a gay bar with me. And she has been doing it since her college days.

It's never occurred to me to get a manager to go into the men's room with me to evaluate it. I typically knock and if no one answers I go on in. I get some funny looks going in or out but so far no confrontations. I would just refer them to the CSR who has the LOA.

Inappropriate post removed by Admin

Probably not the most appropriate post misanthrope