My 15 year old daughter told me that she would like to do a mystery shop with a fine dining restaurant with me, and she is willing to do most of the job to write down details and write the report. But I couldn't find one. Most restaurants don't allow children. Does anyone know if it's possible to get one and how?

I don't know of any that allow someone other than the shopper to do those things. What you are suggesting sounds unethical. Regarding age, a mature 15 year old could in theory not be considered a "child," however, most fine dining shops require an adult guest and many define adult as 21 and over due to alcohol consumption. I would stick with a TXR shop in your situation.

I probably shouldn't comment on this, I don't do fine dining. I'm 65 and I've only ever been in a fine dining restaurant once in my lifetime. But I'm hard headed, so here I go.

In all of the restaurant shops I've done or read the guidelines for I've never seen a single one of them that says your guest must be over 21. I don't think anyone is going to play gotcha over taking a teenager as a guest for a dinner shop. Do the fine dining shops require pictures of your guest?

I know that in the narratives that I write I never identify my guest. When I refer to them I say, "my guest" or "my friend." I never say their name, and I do not take pictures that show their faces, and I also do not identify their gender, race, or skin color.

Obviously, I have no problem with bringing a teenager as a guest to a restaurant. Especially if they know how to conduct themselves and will help with gathering the necessary information for the shop.

At 15, I had a full set of larger than medium sized breasts, and long beautiful chestnut hair, and I could dress up and give the impression that I was an adult.

I'm guessing they say no kids because they don't want the shopper distracted, and they don't want the server to focus on the children's menu or whatever. A well-behaved 15-year-old should not pose a problem on either of those issues. And what a great bonus in that she is willing to do the work, not because it makes it easier for you, but because that will be a great learning experience for her. Of course you will have to make the final edit, and should probably make your own backup notes to ensure accuracy.

Thats fine to let her do the work as a learning experience to shadow you, but YOU need to do the work that is reported. The MSC wants YOUR perspective and not hers. They are also contracting YOU and not her. There is an (obvious) difference in perspective between a 40-50 year old and a 15 year old. Also, I would have considered my daughter at 15 an "adult" if the guidelines didn't specify an age for the guest.

I once did a two night resort shop, and had to dine at the upscale restaurant on site. The guidelines didn't specify the age of the guest, and I took my then-four year old. You could just see the looks of trepidation on the wait staff's faces when we walked in, but, I knew my daughter knew how to behave (and wasn't a picky eater), and at the end of the night, she was getting compliment after compliment. Now, in that situation, it probably made more sense since it was onsite at the resort, so where else were we going to eat, but, if the guidelines didn't specify an age, I'd have no problem taking a 15 year old to Capital Grille or something like that (although I believe Capital Grille usually specifies 21 or over for the guest).

Why not teaching a 15 year old how to do a mystery shop? I also added her as an authorized user on my credit card.

All of the ACL fine dining I've completed states a 21+ restriction. And it's been a hot minute since I've completed a Coyle shop (life is busy) but if I remember correctly it also said 21+.
A bar visit is required for most fine dining shops and those under 21 aren't allowed in the bar in the state I live in.

Also you ask what's wrong with having her write the report?
1. The MSC is contracting with you, not your daughter.
2. The viewpoints for a 15yr old are far different than 40+

OK. Are there mystery shops for children for casual restaurants? not fast food.
I remember 10 years ago, I used to do Buffalow Wild Wings, but I don't see them anymore.

A slightly different perspective and why I don't take my 20YOs as guests when it says 21+... IF they find out, that's a clear violation of terms and they could withhold pay as well as banning you. Not saying this is likely to happen but oh, what an expensive lesson that would be!

I also want to model honesty and integrity for my kids. Having them role play for a shop is one thing, having them lie/deceive to get around rules is another.

I once asked, seeking permission to bring them, and was told no. Asking once was enough for me. If the msc stands firm because the client is rigid? It's not my responsibility to show them it would be OK if they weren't.

@miamiparis wrote:

OK. Are there mystery shops for children for casual restaurants? not fast food.
I remember 10 years ago, I used to do Buffalow Wild Wings, but I don't see them anymore.

Yes, casual dining shops usually allow children "old enough to not be a distraction". Your daughter isn't old enough to be the shopper but she can certainly accompany you and help with remembering details.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/20/2026 02:47PM by Deedeezthoughts.

There is a difference in teaching her how to do a mystery shop and having her keep up with timings and writing the report to submit.

@miamiparis wrote:

Why not teaching a 15 year old how to do a mystery shop? I also added her as an authorized user on my credit card.

The OP did not ask if they should violate the guidelines. I think a well-behaved 15-year-old would be a perfectly fine dining room mystery shop guest as long as the guidelines allow it. If there is a bar component an underage guest (whether they're 15 or 20) could always wait in the car -- like my spouse often does, just because they don't feel like hanging out at the bar.

I am impressed that you can get a teenager to go to a fine dining restaurant however you have to do it. So many people never learn proper dining etiquette.

@NinS wrote:

The OP did not ask if they should violate the guidelines. I think a well-behaved 15-year-old would be a perfectly fine dining room mystery shop guest as long as the guidelines allow it. If there is a bar component an underage guest (whether they're 15 or 20) could always wait in the car -- like my spouse often does, just because they don't feel like hanging out at the bar.

True but it was still suggested that they could so I pointed out why they shouldn't.

The OP said they weren't finding fine dining where the guidelines allow it and that has been my experience as well. I have been actively looking for this information in the guidelines as it is relevant to my situation. For fine dining, it's close enough to a blanket policy that I wouldn't bother searching for a needle in a haystack. Casual dining involving sitting at a bar is prohibited. And, dining with a bar visit before or after dinner has stipulated 21+ guest(s) only for the ones I have seen, no matter how casual. They do allow children for their lunch shop that doesn't have a bar visit, that would be a fine alternative (especially since the menu there is the same all day).

A quick look at my upcoming ACL and Coyle dinner assignments show the same, with ACL stating 21+ and Coyle stating "two adults." Of course there are plenty of other MSCs that do dining room shops and perhaps they have different policies, but your suggestion of seeking a lunch (or breakfast or brunch) shop is an excellent one. The Jack Network specifically has the following to say about one of their shops, which generally do not combine table and bar service. It seems like a teenager (not a child) would be perfectly fine:

Table Service
Because children can be distracting and memorable, their participation in shop scenarios potentially impair the shopper’s evaluation, alter the dining experience and/or threaten shopper anonymity. For these reasons, we generally discourage our shoppers from bringing children during shop visits.
In the event that children do accompany you, we recommend omitting any references to them from your shop report to protect your anonymity.
Bar Service:
As a further consideration, for Bar Service assignments, given the focus (bar experience) and time of day (typically “Late Night”), children are very likely to be prohibited from entering the bar area, preventing completion of the assignment.

@Deedeezthoughts wrote:

The OP said they weren't finding fine dining where the guidelines allow it and that has been my experience as well. I have been actively looking for this information in the guidelines as it is relevant to my situation.

This story is not for this specific situation with a 15 year old but in case some with younger children are reading this thread...Long ago I was happily doing mystery shops for a "boutique" chain of local restaurants where each of their 8 or so "brands" had a different name and a different sort of menu. I loved , loved those shops but then suddenly they were all gone. I asked the scheduler if they were coming back. She told me that a shopper had brought her two young children on a shop who used crayon all over the table top and had made a big mess. This chain did not allow children on shops. There was some issue in the report where the management of the restaurant reviewed their dining room video tapes and was able to identify the shopper and the children. The msc lost the contract for the entire chain of restaurants right then. They did not tell me what happened to the shopper but I expect the shopper was banned.

That's remind me when I was driving on South Beach, my 2 year daughter threw out some things through the window. A cop stopped me. I told him that it wasn't me, it was my daughter, he looked at her and he let me go.

While I do not promote bringing teenagers when the guidelines explicitly prohibit it, and most fine dining shops for Coyle say that "two adults" are required, I do want to add one important note for Coyle shops.

In the Coyle agreement that I signed is this line -
"As an independent contractor, I may sub-contract portions or the entirety of a client project. As the independent contractor who committed to perform a client project, I will be held responsible for all conduct, execution, and deliverables per the Client Scope of Services and any other client communications sent to me by Coyle on behalf of the client."

I have previously confirmed with Coyle that my guests are allowed to contribute to, or even write, some of the report. For example, in some shops, my guest is allowed to have the massage, and then THEY can either provide notes to me or even write up that entire section (since I wasn't the one that had the massage at the spa). Coyle confirmed this is allowed. I am just responsible for the work and guaranteeing it is done properly.

I don't know of any other companies that allow that, but Coyle does, as long as the work is done properly. Thus, IF a teenager is allowed on a Coyle shop, they would be allowed to write up the report, so long as the actual shopper edits and vouches for it. I recently took my teenage son on a hotel stay for Coyle (in which children were allowed), and my teenager went to dinner with me at the restaurant (which was allowed) and helped me with the report. I wanted him to have that experience.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/21/2026 01:30PM by laloweryshops.

Thank you, that's great!

Adding that back when my niece was 17, she had a similar request of me, and I took her to a fine dining shop in San Francisco. It cured her of ever wanting to be a mystery shopper (her mom had also tried and given up on it).

I was also the scheduler for the MSC back then, so it wasn't much of a risk for me, but an adult-acting teen is not a distraction IMHO.

Another forum member once pointed out that it varies by state, but in some locations, kids are legally allowed to sit at a hotel bar with you, so you can do a bar shop with a teen in some circumstances.

I think in California if a bar also serves food you can sit there with people under 21. I doubt a container of slim jims and some pickled eggs count as food. Definitely a marashino cherry on your drink would not count either.

Oh sure, it's legal here, too. Heck, it's common for kids to be in bars that have live music. They card at the door and everyone gets a stamp or an X on their hand. No biggie.

@sandyf wrote:

I think in California if a bar also serves food you can sit there with people under 21. I doubt a container of slim jims and some pickled eggs count as food. Definitely a marashino cherry on your drink would not count either.

I think if there's a food menu it's allowed. The shop in question where it came up was a hotel by Universal Studios and I brought a 12 year with me (goddaughter). No issues. Yes; she ordered the Shirley Temple. We didn't order any other food.

My step son loves to do the bar/dinner shops with me now, but he's drinking age.