feel free to list your achievements for today

I'm sorry Ms. Ninja for diverting the thread in this manner.

Other than picking up some well-paying grocery shops for ACL today, I didn't really achieve much. I am super excited though because they pay a flat fee of $28 each, so if I only spend $10 I get to pocket the rest (way cool), and they aren't far from home! I have never seen grocery stores with them before.

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@JASFLALMT wrote:

My husband tells me how beautiful I am when I wake up in the morning, and he says it like he really means it And when I tell him that I love him, often he says, "I love you more." Now that's romantic.

Live consciously....

David did not give insight into anything. He repeated a stereotype as a @#$%& fact.

Since you are not going to bother to read and comprehend my entire post, why bother reading any of it? Proof is you asking how I would treat someone who makes that choice in their life right after my acknowledgement couples have to make the decisions that work best for them.

As a long time member of this forum, I do not understand your support and encouragement of a spammer and troll.

Equal rights for others does not mean fewer rights for you. It's not pie.
"I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag." -Molly Ivins
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It's a waste of your time and it really annoys the pig.

shopper-et-al, what the heck?

One achievement: Reading various threads on this forum and doing my best to not pass judgement on anyone posting here, including some with many posts and years behind their names, as well as those with "new member" listed.

I love doing the Sunoco shops when they bump the pay up a bit. As for me, well this week i did 4 Cadillac mystery service shops (running out of things to do to the Caddy) but each paid 90.00 so all good. I worked fund raising for the Christian Veterans of America, Visited 3 out patient clinics at VA hospitals to chat with some Vets that needed help and or advice , pretty much filled up my week.

OMG....if I want to read a novel, I'll go to the library...every post is longer than Shoptastic...HELP!!!
Today will be two shops, house cleaning, planting pots and whatever else I can get done. Writing to my daughter to get over our bump in the road will be a huge achievement.

Live consciously....

This is currently ongoing but we are moving later this month. So while this month has been light on work, I'm okay with that as it gives me some time for packing and kids starting school. I can't wait to just move already, but need some time for it too.

Mourning the senseless separation of a bear family in Harlowton, MT. It is too late to educate the @#%@#&$^$%# humans who chased bear cubs in hopes of photographing the youngsters. These
^*%$@!#@$ humans dared to get between cubs and Mama Bear and the cubs ran away, in the opposite direction of their Mama. Mama could not find her babies. Finally, authorities found cubs. Now, cubs will spend a year in artificial rearing before releasement. Poor babies. Poor Mama. I do not know why Mama did not attack the !@#@%$^&^* humans. There may be a story there.

Why can't silly dammmed humans respect critters?!?!?

*edited*
This only counts as an achievement if even one unnecessary human/critter incident is averted.

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. - Lao-Tzu

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/08/2017 07:52AM by Shop-et-al.

@Shop-et-al wrote:

Some people (but not JASFLALMT!!!) do perceive that doing dishes and laundry are lightening a load and being loving and therefore being romantic. Some say that it gives them time for romance that they would not otherwise have. Other people would like to be told something "romantic". They want to hear about romance. There are three or four other categories of romantic preference.

'zactly. Love languages. Much more romantic to me to do some of my chores to give me free time than to whisper sweet nothings in my ear or give me a gift. Other people feel differently. As long as both people in the relationship understand what each other wants/needs, it works.

"Let me offer you my definition of social justice: I keep what I earn and you keep what you earn. Do you disagree? Well then tell me how much of what I earn belongs to you - and why?” ~Walter Williams

@LisaSTL wrote:

I'm not arguing the concept of couple's, housemates or anyone else divvying up chores in whatever way works for them. It was the perpetuation of a long dead 1950's stereotype that was offensive. Thank goodness most people have evolved.

Maybe offensive to you; that doesn't mean it was universally offensive.

Yes, all stereotypes are offensive. The post that furthered that one has since been deleted. Unless you read it, my comment is out of context.

No, I didn't read it. Again, however, you assume that your view of stereotypes is universal. It's not. A stereotype is “...a fixed, over generalized belief about a particular group or class of people.” According to Simply Psychology, they are a way to simplify our social world by reducing the amount of processing we have to do when we meet a new person.

It is when stereotypes are challenged by facts and those facts then ignored in favor of the stereotype that they become offensive. If I stereotype police officers as law-abiding based on statistics and personal experience, it is only offensive if I refuse to acknowledge one that is errant. Or if I stereotype, say, the Pinoy community in my area as tight-knit and family-minded based on statistics and experience, but refuse to see individuals who don't fit that mold, that's offensive. The stereotype itself is not; refusing to acknowledge that individuals might not fit the stereotype is.

I was just about to post the same thing. Prejudging based on a stereotype is offensive, not the stereotype itself. Bald men stereotypically have a higher sex drive. This is based strongly on medical background. Baldness is caused by higher levels of testosterone, higher levels of testosterone normally indicates a higher sex drive. That's not offensive. What's offensive is if you assume I am a sex fiend because I'm bald.

There are reasons that a body stays in motion
At the moment only demons come to mind

The idea that anyone finds it romantic that their spouse does a chore for them is still part of an idea that encourages the idea that women are an underclass and I fight it every day in every way.

I was addressing only Lisa's statement that all stereotypes are offensive.

There are reasons that a body stays in motion
At the moment only demons come to mind

Why is it offensive when two people, in their own relationship, determine what is romantic? Why does anyone assume it is the woman who is being put down? Is a male who is the more domestic one then also considered an underclass? Often times relationship, male/female or same sex, have one spouse who does more cleaning than the other. Is it really anyone's concern how a couple chooses to function as long as they both agree?

"Why does anyone assume it is the woman who is being put down?"
For the same reason that if you have two people who have the exact same qualification and the white male gets the job over the black male, you may assume that a systematic history of repression may be at work.

People who refuse to take history and systematic oppression into account are waving the privilege flag. Of course it's not ALWAYS the case, but it is often the case which is why it must be considered.

@Iamme wrote:

Why is it offensive when two people, in their own relationship, determine what is romantic? Why does anyone assume it is the woman who is being put down? Is a male who is the more domestic one then also considered an underclass? Often times relationship, male/female or same sex, have one spouse who does more cleaning than the other. Is it really anyone's concern how a couple chooses to function as long as they both agree?

For giggles, I looked up women and work through the ages.

Fear not. This stereotype is not our only consideration. Apparently, women have performed all types of work for centuries. The nature of tasks has varied due to geography, time in history, and other factors.

Tasks range from menial to managerial or leadership.

Is the stereotype misinformed? Does it merely overlook or ignore individual differences and styles and how these may contribute to couple and family styles? I will look into these concepts as time permits.

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. - Lao-Tzu

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/08/2017 01:16PM by Shop-et-al.

lamme, I made it clear it is up to each couple to find what works best for them. Despite implications to the contrary, it is not people's choices I find offensive nor would those choices change my opinion of either party. The comment since deleted was a sweeping generalization of all women made by a man, who also attributed it to another "very wise man." He later walked it back to say it applied to his own relationship.

Stereotypes most often have a negative connotation because they reduce people to only their gender or race. This oversimplification has been proven to have negative consequences. Gender and racial stereotypes cannot be compared to assumptions made about a person based on something they choose, such as their career.

Medical studies correlating baldness, testosterone and sex drive would not be a stereotype any more than stating during menopause women experience a drop in estrogen levels. Both are based on science. The stereotype would be menopausal women are crazy.

Perhaps the OP deserves credit for learning within and from his own marriage. As it turns out, the OP's situation is not unique and a male person authored an informed book that explained why this is so.

The OP made another point, indirectly. Humans can and sometimes do learn throughout life.

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. - Lao-Tzu

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/08/2017 01:39PM by Shop-et-al.

I think if we all look deep inside we will find that each of us is guilty of some level of stereotyping. If I am very tall man of a certain race, how many people will look at me and wonder if I play basketball? If I am a woman of a certain religion wearing a certain type of dress, how many people will wonder if I am oppressed? If I'm a man of a certain race with a shaved head, black vest and covered with tats, how many people think I'm...

As far as a white male getting hired over a black male, I can wonder if systematic oppression is at play, but I'm not going to assume. In reality there are never two people with the exact same qualifications and who interview the same, with the same references. I would need more facts.

When married, i remember Saturday was Burger day in our inside grill, which had my husband doing the cooking.
Talk about a major mess, and my job was cleaning up (which I did), and then the three of us went shopping, it worked!!!, Sometimes we just do the right thing at the time, and don't put any other pressure on it. Never bothered me then, may bother me now, i have evolved, not saying it's better cause now i pay my own bills...

and do my own cleaning.....not right to judge anyone else's lifestyle, but I did raise a daughter whose motto is EQUAL Partnership only.......

Live consciously....

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/08/2017 06:58PM by Irene_L.A..

I agree wholeheartedly and don't consider myself without guilt in that department. Ideally that same self-reflection helps us evaluate and make course corrections along the way

@Iamme wrote:

I think if we all look deep inside we will find that each of us is guilty of some level of stereotyping.

@JASFLALMT wrote:

I'm sorry Ms. Ninja for diverting the thread in this manner.

there are bigger stress in life than hijacking threads in ms forum.

whpo is this david person that people r fighting over? another bald guy w/high sex drive?

@Shop-et-al wrote:

Perhaps the OP deserves credit for learning within and from his own marriage. As it turns out, the OP's situation is not unique and a male person authored an informed book that explained why this is so.

The OP made another point, indirectly. Humans can and sometimes do learn throughout life.

im op of this thread but i have no idea what u r talking about.

@MSNinja wrote:

@Shop-et-al wrote:

Perhaps the OP deserves credit for learning within and from his own marriage. As it turns out, the OP's situation is not unique and a male person authored an informed book that explained why this is so.

The OP made another point, indirectly. Humans can and sometimes do learn throughout life.
im op of this thread but i have no idea what u r talking about.

My bad. This thread has become so much about a questionable stereotype, which someone linked to an accomplishment that was posted by someone who posts/-ed with initials "D. C." MSNinja, thank you, a million times thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, this is one of your achievements for today, eh?

*applause*

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. - Lao-Tzu

MsNinja, you missed absolutely nothing worthwhile.

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