Random Stuff-Getting to Know You.... theft/childhood/etc
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@mlzg,
Yes, I have thought about writing a book. I have four chapters done. I have had lots of trauma in my life...I think due to my childhood.
All of the "typical" stuff has happened:
*Self cutting VERY often when I was young (teen)
*Failed relationships
*Abusive relationships
*Rape
*PTSD
*Anger and Anxiety Issues
*Hospitalization for suicide attempt @ age 16
I just am so afraid to write the book. Dredging it up is hard as hell. And the book would dredge it all up and it would keep on going...and worse, in the public eye. So there's that.
I, too, have feared for my financial safety. I've been so hungry and so sick so many days of my (younger) life, that I have done a lot to make sure that never happens again. I'm sometimes a food hoarder...not where I keep old stuff in my backpack anymore...but where I overbuy and overstock.
At one point, I had a whole spare bathroom filled with food and toiletries....I'm talking ALL the cabinet space AND on top of, behind, around the toilet and sink....AND the bathtub was filled nearly to the ceiling with stuff stacked up. So I'd never go hungry, be stinky, or have to use toilet paper for feminine needs.
I worked four jobs for a time. Didn't have a day off for over six months at a clip sometimes. After a year of that, I cut down to 3 jobs and that lasted for a couple years. But then, it was ALWAYS 2 jobs. I purchased a house and had a mortgage of $602 a month. It was a 3 bed/2 bath, but 2 beds and a bath were upstairs in a "loft" area. I rented out each of those bedrooms for $300 a month. Then, with working as much as I did and having "no" mortgage/rent because of room mates, I bought another house strictly as a rental. I made a couple hundred bucks on it per month. I was 23.
My now husband (of 18 1/2) years met me when I was like that. He is the one who showed me how life is SUPPOSED to be.
A lifetime is a long time to hold onto anything, though, and both of those houses were sold in times when we were cash strapped.
When I was a kid, and my dad kicked me out, he called the cops on me so that I would not take anything that "he" gave me. The cops stood around while I was leaving, scratching their heads about this guy who would do that. He wouldn't let me leave with a coat or any medication that I needed. He told me that my clothes on my back were his. I had gotten a hope chest as a BIRTHDAY GIFT and my friends and I were trying to haul that ONE item out of the house. (Guess I misspoke in the previous post. My furniture in my apartment was a cot, blanket, and that hopechest that served as my "couch"
One of my friends heard him say that the clothes on my back were his and threw a $20 bill at him for "the clothes." He filed a restraining order against me so that I could not come on his property or see my younger brothers. He changed all the locks. Now I'm 47, and my parents and I have a "tentative" relationship, but I still don't have a key to their house.
It killed me not seeing my younger brothers. And the kicker: the apartment I lived in had a bathroom window that faced my parents' backyard. My brothers were building a "fort" in the backyard and I would hear them hammering when I opened the window. One day, (can't remember how, exactly), they found out where I lived and would sneak food to me through the fence that separated the apartment complex from the houses...
My now husband (of 18 1/2) years met me when I was like that. He is the one who showed me how life is SUPPOSED to be.
Yes, I have thought about writing a book. I have four chapters done. I have had lots of trauma in my life...I think due to my childhood.
All of the "typical" stuff has happened:
*Self cutting VERY often when I was young (teen)
*Failed relationships
*Abusive relationships
*Rape
*PTSD
*Anger and Anxiety Issues
*Hospitalization for suicide attempt @ age 16
I just am so afraid to write the book. Dredging it up is hard as hell. And the book would dredge it all up and it would keep on going...and worse, in the public eye. So there's that.
I, too, have feared for my financial safety. I've been so hungry and so sick so many days of my (younger) life, that I have done a lot to make sure that never happens again. I'm sometimes a food hoarder...not where I keep old stuff in my backpack anymore...but where I overbuy and overstock.
At one point, I had a whole spare bathroom filled with food and toiletries....I'm talking ALL the cabinet space AND on top of, behind, around the toilet and sink....AND the bathtub was filled nearly to the ceiling with stuff stacked up. So I'd never go hungry, be stinky, or have to use toilet paper for feminine needs.
I worked four jobs for a time. Didn't have a day off for over six months at a clip sometimes. After a year of that, I cut down to 3 jobs and that lasted for a couple years. But then, it was ALWAYS 2 jobs. I purchased a house and had a mortgage of $602 a month. It was a 3 bed/2 bath, but 2 beds and a bath were upstairs in a "loft" area. I rented out each of those bedrooms for $300 a month. Then, with working as much as I did and having "no" mortgage/rent because of room mates, I bought another house strictly as a rental. I made a couple hundred bucks on it per month. I was 23.
My now husband (of 18 1/2) years met me when I was like that. He is the one who showed me how life is SUPPOSED to be.
A lifetime is a long time to hold onto anything, though, and both of those houses were sold in times when we were cash strapped.
When I was a kid, and my dad kicked me out, he called the cops on me so that I would not take anything that "he" gave me. The cops stood around while I was leaving, scratching their heads about this guy who would do that. He wouldn't let me leave with a coat or any medication that I needed. He told me that my clothes on my back were his. I had gotten a hope chest as a BIRTHDAY GIFT and my friends and I were trying to haul that ONE item out of the house. (Guess I misspoke in the previous post. My furniture in my apartment was a cot, blanket, and that hopechest that served as my "couch"
One of my friends heard him say that the clothes on my back were his and threw a $20 bill at him for "the clothes." He filed a restraining order against me so that I could not come on his property or see my younger brothers. He changed all the locks. Now I'm 47, and my parents and I have a "tentative" relationship, but I still don't have a key to their house.
It killed me not seeing my younger brothers. And the kicker: the apartment I lived in had a bathroom window that faced my parents' backyard. My brothers were building a "fort" in the backyard and I would hear them hammering when I opened the window. One day, (can't remember how, exactly), they found out where I lived and would sneak food to me through the fence that separated the apartment complex from the houses...
My now husband (of 18 1/2) years met me when I was like that. He is the one who showed me how life is SUPPOSED to be.
@mlzg,
I have also been doing the surveys...I just haven't "earned" anything yet (just started a couple weeks ago) because I don't have a lot of time to put into it.
But as far as MSing sometimes being "below min wage," I still do it when it makes sense for me to do it.
In my mind: $10 that I made while MSing is $10 more than I had yesterday....even if it took me 2 hours to earn it
I also babysit at a rate that is below "market value." Partly because I can't be tied to a M-F 40 hour work week for various reasons. Also because I feel like I'm at home often (I homeschool 4 kids) and I can take on another child or two during that time. And I feel like I'm "helping people out/contributing to society" with the half a dozen families that I do this for, so it gives me a bit of "purpose." Along with a little extra money.
I have also been doing the surveys...I just haven't "earned" anything yet (just started a couple weeks ago) because I don't have a lot of time to put into it.
But as far as MSing sometimes being "below min wage," I still do it when it makes sense for me to do it.
In my mind: $10 that I made while MSing is $10 more than I had yesterday....even if it took me 2 hours to earn it
I also babysit at a rate that is below "market value." Partly because I can't be tied to a M-F 40 hour work week for various reasons. Also because I feel like I'm at home often (I homeschool 4 kids) and I can take on another child or two during that time. And I feel like I'm "helping people out/contributing to society" with the half a dozen families that I do this for, so it gives me a bit of "purpose." Along with a little extra money.
I have done some similar things. I'm always worried about running out of food and toiletries. I will say "But there might be a blizzard; I need to stock up!" It's never necessary, but I do it. I sent a friend home with a large grocery bag full of food when she visited a few weeks ago. Looked in my cabinet and fridge after she left, and I still had too much food. I also prefer to have money coming in from different sources. When I was in college, it was working at the mall and babysitting/tutoring + camp in the summer. After graduating, it was teaching in a school M-F and providing home therapy to kids on the weekends. Now I have the same exact job title, but I work for three different companies. One does a paper check once a month, another does direct deposit once a month, and the last does direct deposit 2x a month. Getting paid 4x a month makes me feel more secure, however it feels strange not to have a *different* part-time job (my MSing is mainly reimbursements). I use an online bank that gives good interest rates and I always have the current interest rates memorized and will calculate how much I can make depending on which route I choose. I won't take classes at a private college. I was able to pay for my masters in cash (I took out over 3k from the bank and walked through Manhattan to school and paid for the full-time semester- I didn't understand how to do a bank check or what on earth to do LOL) and that was all from my camp salary, tips, babysitting, etc. The public universities in NYC are very affordable. I know that I've got more $$ saved for retirement & just regular savings than most of my friends close to my age. Some of my coworkers who are older than I am will tell me things like they had to break into their IRA and get penalized to cover bills. Or, "What's an IRA?" (we don't get 401k at our job). I am stunned at how casual people are about their finances.
***I agree. Money coming at all times of the month is great. I don't actually "work" now, other than to MS, babysit and tutor. And I occasionally pick up a PT/temp job. It bothers me more and more as time goes on. I also don't have a lot of money in IRA's or savings accounts, though like you, I know interest rates and best places to put my money very well. We do have four (almost five....as of January) rental properties, and I just have no spare money at the moment. But every time someone else pays rent, I think of it as money in the bank....just not as liquid***
I agree with you about the "that's $10 more than I had yesterday" mentality. I make very good money since starting my current job, but I still love adding $5 or $10 to my savings account from a phone shop. I was thinking about opening a savings account and just putting in phone shop fees and reimbursements in there to see how high I can get.
***I've thought the same. I decided to leave my paypal account alone as long as I can to see how much I can save in there***
I just checked the main survey website I use. I have earned almost $350 "lifetime", but I've been using the site for years with varying degrees of participation. I will get Bath & Body Works gift cards and buy holiday presents there (love their scented wall plug-in things), a Visa card to use at any online retailer, Amazon, Fandango, etc.
***Is this something like swagbucks? I'm going to have to start doing that more***
Renting out rooms and buying properties in your early 20's...incredible!
***Necessary. Just wish I could have held onto them because they would be nearly paid off and worth 3x what I paid for them
Your post made me think that I should pause grocery shopping and just use up what's in my cabinets for a bit. I did a "no spend February" and kept it going through March and saved a good amount. Maybe I will do a no grocery shopping (except for fruits/veggies) half a month or so
***LOL. My post made me think the same thing. Went to my pantry and thought that it is time to eat up what all is in there. Also toothpaste and deodorant and soap. I think I have enough bars of soap to last my family of six for 10 years lol ***
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Just wanted to tell you that you seem like a real sweetheart despite all the tough times you've had. I am so glad that you are in a safe and in a good spot now
Oh, and I like your idea of leaving the $ in PayPal to see how much you accumulate, however... It would bug me too much not to be getting the 1.9% - 2.27% interest rate that some of these online banks are offering. I know it's not going to make me rich, but I love getting my interest paid each month!
With Ally, I open up however many savings accounts I want and separate money for different things.
VioBank is offering over 2% interest on liquid savings. Thank goodness the rates are up a little bit!
Okay, now to go chill out for real... Have a nice night!
With Ally, I open up however many savings accounts I want and separate money for different things.
VioBank is offering over 2% interest on liquid savings. Thank goodness the rates are up a little bit!
Okay, now to go chill out for real... Have a nice night!
lol....you're young. I remember having a job when I was about 14 and putting my money in a CD. Got 12% back in those days. It was glorious
You have a good night, too
You have a good night, too
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