@shoptastic wrote:
Yeah, I think there was some intuitive aspect of what you were saying. I actually am not that familiar with nursing and/or assisted care/living homes (don't really know the difference actually). I don't have any relatives in them, but do have many senior family members.
When I was younger, nursing homes were pretty much the only option (1970's-1980's). Unfortunately, many times Seniors were "dumped" there and much of the "staring off into space" that one often witnessed was because people had just given up. They also were helpful when someone could no longer live at home. At that time, there also wasn't the availability of home care, so no longer being able to live at home sometimes only meant that they couldn't shop for groceries any longer or cook for themselves. Also, there was definitely a difference depending on income levels and gender (far fewer beds for men because men don't live as long so the space wasn't there so you took what you could get). We had to place 2 Grandparents in homes because we could no longer take care of them at home (Grandpa had ALS, Grandma had mini-strokes) but literally had to visit every day to make sure that everything was on the up and up. Sadly, staff was paid barely above minimum wage then and it hasn't gotten much better. Staff tries their best but are working with very limited resources.
Now there is a whole universe of care, much of it very pricey. Senior Living ranges from communities with a variety of levels of a la carte services (housekeeping, personal care, daily check-ins, etc), assisted living (generally own apartment with more daily services and medication dispensing), another level that is more intense but can't remember what it is, to memory care which usually are locked floors that have staff dedicated to dealing with memory issues but sometimes those services can be accessed while living in the same unit. As a family we were very fortunate that my Dad was good with money so that he was able to move into a place that would have allowed him to move to the memory care floor once that was needed (such as wandering off). He passed away before things got to that point. However, as good as the higher priced places are, they are communal living situations and very difficult to keep folks "confined to quarters". My Dad's place didn't have a kitchen in the unit so he had to take his meals in the communal dining room. Also, if regular routines are disrupted, memory issues can be exacerbated or decline accelerated.
Some Seniors, too, prefer the Senior Living type place for a variety of reasons. For the right price, you can move into an apartment with gourmet meals, outings, etc. handled for you. Often they have on-site beauty and barber shops and take care of your laundry. Trust me, these places have amazing food and an incredible social schedule (side note, the staff knew that something was wrong with my Dad when he quit being the first one in line for the outings)! At some they will check on you if you don't open your door by a certain time each day and, at the minimum, have call buttons throughout the unit. Most of these places allow you to remain in the same unit and then just add additional services if and when you need them.